I remember listening to this song, too too early in the morning. You were playing it in the bathroom as you brushed your teeth and got yourself ready to leave me again. (What a time to be left behind, when I can open a gps app and watch you be carried away from me in real time.) I lay in our bed. It was just a mattress on the floor and that was it for furniture. I was awake and listening. It was only that first blue light of day, but already engines were revving, gears changing, motorbikes out on the street. That street I could never pronounce right and I’ve already forgotten the name of. The street where we lived. God, I thought if I tried hard enough I could remember it but it’s gone from me tonight. You said once, “You don’t really live somewhere until you know all the street names.”
I wasn’t afraid to wake up early and go with you, to the office where transport would pick you up and drive you, two hours south, too fast into the jungle. Last kiss for a while but I wasn’t thinking about how much I would miss you. I was just trying to memorize the landmarks. I was thinking about the fucking traffic and then, sitting on the heavy bike, how the fuck am I going to drive this thing?